Conflict Management Style Survey
by Marc Robert
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Instructions: Choose a single frame of reference for answering all fifteen items (e.g., work-related conflicts, family conflicts or social conflicts) and keep that frame of reference in mind when answering the items.
Allocate 10 points among the four alternative answers given for each of the fifteen items below, then when completed press the 'Check Scores" button at the bottom. This will confirm that you have allocated the full 10 points in each of the 15 items below. Then you will be able to display your results
Example: When the people I supervise become involved in a personal conflict, I usually:
Intervene to settle dispute.
Call a meeting to talk over the problem.
Offer to help if I can.
Ignore the problem.
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When someone I care about is actively hostile towards me, i.e., yelling, threatening, abusive, etc., I tend to:
Respond in a hostile manner.
Try to persuade the person to give up his/her actively hostile behaviour.
Stay and listen as long as possible.
Walk away.
When someone who is relatively unimportant to me is actively hostile toward me, i.e., yelling, threatening, abusive, etc., I tend to:
When I observe people in conflicts in which anger, threats, hostility, and strong opinions are present, I tend to:
Become involved and take positions.
Attempt to mediate.
Observe to see what happens.
Leave as quickly as possible.
When I perceive another person as meeting his/her needs at my expense, I am apt to:
Work to do anything I can to change that person.
Rely on persuasion and “facts” when attempting to have that person change.
Work hard at changing how I relate to that person.
Accept the situation as it is.
When involved in an interpersonal dispute, my general pattern is to:
Draw the other person into seeing the problem as I do.
Examine the issues between us as logically as possible.
Look hard for a workable compromise.
Let time take its course and let the problem work itself out.
The quality that I value the most in dealing with conflict would be:
Emotional strength and security.
Intelligence.
Love and openness.
Patience.
Following a serious altercation with someone I care for deeply, I:
Strongly desire to go back and settle things my way.
Want to go back and work it out- whatever give- and-take is necessary.
Worry about it a lot but not plan to initiate further contact.
Let it lie and not plan to initiate further contact.
When I see a serious conflict developing between two people I care about, I tend:
Express my disappointment that this had to happen.
Attempt to persuade them to resolve their differences.
Watch to see what develops.
Leave the scene.
When I see a serious conflict developing between two people who are relatively unimportant to me, I tend to:
The feedback that I receive from most people about how I behave when faced with conflict and opposition indicates that I:
Try hard to get my way.
Try to work out differences cooperatively.
Am easy going and take a soft or conciliatory position.
Usually avoid the conflict.
When communicating with someone with whom I am having serious conflict, I:
Try to overpower the other person with my speech.
Talk a little bit more than I listen.
Am an active listener (feeding back words and feelings).
Am a passive listener (agreeing and apologizing).
When involved in an unpleasant conflict, I:
Use humour with the other party.
Make an occasional quip or joke about the situation or the relationship.
Relate humour only to myself.
Suppress all attempts at humour.
When someone does something that irritates me (e.g., smokes in a non-smoking area or crowds in line in front of me), my tendency in communicating with the offending person is to:
Insist that the person look me in the eye.
Look the person directly in the eye and maintain eye contact.
Maintain intermittent eye contact.
Avoid looking directly at the person.
Stand close and make physical contact.
Use my hands and body to illustrate my points.
Stand close to the person without touching him or her.
Stand back and keep my hands to myself.
Use strong, direct language and tell the person to stop.
Try to persuade the person to stop.
Talk gently and tell the person what my feelings are.
Say and do nothing.
Reproduced from
User’s Guide to
The Pfeiffer & Company Instrumentation Kit
San Diego, CA: Pfeiffer & Company
